Strength of personality is not quite enough

I did suffer the shock of borrower's remorse the first time my whopping new mortgage payment came in, yikes! What had I gotten myself into? Oh well, shit, it's done I might as well get to work. The railroad ties were delivered and sitting in the driveway waiting for my creative attention. I threw the billing statement into the inbox, put on my gloves and went down to start laying out my design.

They were kind of smelly, creosote was leaking out of the grain and they were really splintery and rough. I don't know what I expected but I proceeded to lift the top tie and when I couldn't budge it I was certain it was hung up on the strapping. Nope, I tried again and again and no go. I became really exasperated and then dawned on me that I just couldn't do this, I had to face it, I sat down on the concrete and started crying like a girlie girl, my ex husband was right, I had no sense of practicality, no concept of concrete planning and my head was way up my…well, in the clouds.

My all around good guy neighbor happened by during my moment of despair and cheerfully offered his assistance. He mitigated my self deprecation by informing me that RR ties weighed around 95 lbs. and were awkward as hell to carry—even for a guy. Another neighbor drove by and joined in, he gave me a couple numbers to call to line up some workers he knew and they said they'd be down to help on Saturday morning. The sun came out again.